4In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. 5And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons:
“My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline,
and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
6because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son.”
7Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? 8If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. 9Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! 10Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. 11No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.
12Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. 13″Make level paths for your feet,” so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed. [Hebrews 12:4-13]
Possibly the most frustrating thing that I ever heard from my parents when I was growing up was, “This hurts me more than it hurts you.” Or, when my parents were punishing me (which tended to happen quite a bit), they might have said, “I’m doing this because I love you.” Those statements never made any difference to me, though. Most times, they just went in one ear, and out the other. They never got through to me. Why?
Because I was blinded by the pain I was experiencing – it was all I could see. I was hurting; it sucked.
It never really occurred to me that those things could actually be true, though.
The Bible really asserts this point of view, however. The Bible talks about how God is constantly, and consistently, working for our own good, in whatever He does.
First off, Jesus said in John 10:10 that he came to give us life, and that to the full. The Enemy came only to steal, kill and destroy us. Jesus’ nature is life giving. Secondly, Romans 8:28 says that in everything God works for the good of those who love Him. Then in Hebrews 12:10, it says that he’s disciplining us for our own good. Moreover, it says that discipline is the tool which enables us to share in his holiness.
And honestly, the discipline is not what should be feared. What should be feared is the absence of discipline. Since we are called to holiness (c.f. 1 Peter 1:15-16; 1 Thessalonians 4:7; 2 Timothy 1:9), and God works holiness in us by disciplining us, it is necessary in the life of a believer. If we claim to be children of God, yet our Father has not disciplined us, then something is wrong. Because “if you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons” (v. 8).
I’m not saying that we should go around as gluttons for punishment. We shouldn’t believe that if we haven’t felt horrible that day, or if we haven’t been chastised in the last hour that we’ve lost our salvation. God’s discipline is just a sign of his love and a mark of our sonship (or daughtership…) (v. 5).
It’s hard. It hurts, but it’s in love; and in the end it produces righteousness.
So when God calls you to give something up, or to drop a bad habit, never think that you are taking a step backward, or that you’re losing something. That’s a lie. In every act of love and obedience, we move forward; from glory to glory.
Therefore, as the writer of Hebrews said: “let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart (1:1-3).